Humor Quotes | |
| I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land. - | |
| Jon Stewart | |
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Humor Quotes | |
| I commend my soul to any god that can find it. - | |
| Terry Pratchett | |
Humor Quotes | |
| I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. - | |
| W.C. Fields | |
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Humor Quotes | |
| I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled. - | |
| P.G. Wodehouse | |
Humor Quotes | |
| I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio. - | |
| Rodney Dangerfield | |
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Humor Quotes | |
| I did not marry the first girl that I fell in love with, because there was a tremendous religious conflict, at the time. She was an atheist, and I was an agnostic. - | |
| Woody Allen |